Dealing with toxic family members can be hard. It takes your inner strength making you feel like every time you are near them; you walk on eggshells. It’s not easy admitting to yourself that a family member is toxic. Acceptance helps in your journey towards mental stability. Some people have fallen into depression because of being in such situations while others no longer have social lives due to such family members.
The positive side is that there is always a way out. Before you even start dealing with how to handle such toxic relationships, how do you identify such family members?
- Some believe they are never wrong. When in an argument with them, and it’s their fault, they will always deny being in the wrong. You end up being frustrated which later pushes you to be unstable.
- Others are too controlling. They will try to control the conversation. Sometimes they will even try to control your life and who you associate with. They easily manipulate you and you may end up having self-esteem issues.
- Lies destroy relationships. A family member may pretend to be really nice to you but when in the company of the rest of the family, they bad mouth you. You find out through other people which ultimately causes a severe strain on your relationship.
- You may be working and the said family member knows that you are stable. They keep asking you for money and leaving you in debt with empty promises of repaying. They may push you towards applying for loans to service their lifestyle. Only apply for a loan when it’s for your own use to make the repayment easier. Some are high interest loans while others are moderate.
Toxic relationships with family members can affect you in a way that could be too late. However, some ideas will make you free of such relations. It is a personal decision from you. You decide you don’t want that life any more. Here are some ways in which you can get away from such:
- Setting boundaries. Sometimes, you may not necessarily need to cut ties with them, but instead, have limitations. You decide you won’t loan them out any more. You choose no more frequent visits or calls.
- Prioritize yourself. Always make yourself a priority. Your happiness depends on the decisions you make. Don’t make any excuses for them. This will be your journey towards recovery of the damage.
- Be strong. If anything, you need to be strong for yourself. A toxic relationship has the ability to leave you feeling worthless. However, have the strength to make the decision that you have had enough of the family member who’s always making you feel worthless.
- Cut ties with them. This is easier said than done. Sometimes, you may visualize and see the hell they have put you through and the only option left is cutting ties with them. This will mean no talking to them. It’s a process, be patient with yourself.
- Concentrate on the positive people you have. What you need are positive people in your life. Surround yourself with people who know your journey and who are willing to support you. A family does not only mean by blood but there are friends you meet, and they become family.
All in all, leaving people behind is not an easy decision to do. Depending on the extremity of your situation, you can always see a counselor to help you transition. All the best!